President’s Message

Have you ever walked into services on a Friday night or Saturday morning and noticed the odd arrangement of seating? People seem to be spread out willy-nilly around the sanctuary with a few small clusters here and there. The front row is empty unless there is a Bar or Bat Mitzvah; there are some families, some singles, some couples in a seemingly random pattern, and a bunch of children in the back row. But if you were to take a mental picture (photography is not allowed on Shabbat, so we have to make do with our minds) and come back the following week, you would find that it is not so random and that people are generally in the same places. These are our assigned seats. (more…)

Shalom Bayit means literally, peace at home. And, while the Talmudic scholars may tell us that it refers to marital harmony, the Scolnic scholars will all tell us that it refers to Temple harmony. For the past 28 years, Rabbi Scolnic has been counseling us in the importance of keeping the peace, maintaining positive relationships, and releasing personal grudges. While this advice has not always been popular, it works. I know it is not always easy to hear someone tell you to “let it go” when you feel slighted or wronged; but keeping the peace can be more important than personal pride. (more…)

In our drive to squeeze maximum efficiency out of every aspect of our modern lives, we have inadvertently developed a new level of laziness. I am referring to, of course, the ever prevalent “app” (short for applications because we can’t be bothered to waste time speaking whole words anymore) that many of us use on our smart phones or tablets. We have apps for games so we do not have to interact with other people, apps to find our way to places so we do not have to get out a real paper map or plan ahead, apps for picking restaurants, apps for condensed news, and of course apps to manage our apps. One of my favorites is a conversion app that I use for work. Now I never have to remember how many BTU’s in a gallon of oil (I am sure everyone has this number on the tip of their tongues) or how many liters in a gallon. (more…)

Adapted from the Installation remarks on June 24, 2011

After the July 2010 Board of Directors Meeting, there was an internal workshop to help focus the Board and set some priorities for the year. We divided into two groups and spent an hour discussing our vision for the Temple. A series of questions was used to generate the discussion, the first of which was very basic and broad: What is the purpose of the Temple? Why are we here? After some structured idea generation and discussion, we voted and ranked the thoughts presented to develop some numerical analysis and the results were not surprising.

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Temple Beth Sholom has the most dedicated and expansive core of volunteers I have ever had the pleasure of working with. When you look closely at other volunteer organizations, you find a very small core of people behind the scenes. In our case, the list of people volunteering for one thing or another extends to a large part of our membership list.

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Over the past several years that I have been involved with the Board, there have been several debates over requiring a minimum standard of preparation for Bar and Bat Mitzvah. The discussions have always been thought provoking and interesting, but never seriously moved towards a motion or the setting of policy due to the lack of consensus. The focal point of the discussion each time has been educational standards. For example, should students demonstrate some level of Hebrew fluency, some knowledge of the holidays, or some basic grasp of our customs and traditions surrounding Shabbat? Should they be required to attend services a certain number of times in their Bar/Bat Mitzvah year?

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Dear Fellow Members of Temple Beth Sholom,

Every year on Yom Kippur, the President stands before the congregation and asks for contributions.  It’s the one time during the year when we have everyone’s attention, and tradition says we cannot pass over the opportunity.  This year, you all responded with characteristic zeal and we were able to meet our budget for the High Holiday appeal.  Thank you for supporting this effort. (more…)

The Jewish Federation of Greater New Haven recently completed a demographic study and analysis of the Jewish population in its service area.  The entire results of the survey can be found at www.jewishdatabank.org under the link for New Haven, and I encourage you all to review the findings for yourselves.  Essentially, the study found what we already suspected:  the New Haven Jewish community is slowly declining, the majority of the population is in the 50 and over age range, and young people are not moving into or staying in Connecticut.  Not a shock to anyone.  We also learned that there are 1630 Jewish households (defined as one or more Jewish adults) and 3200 Jewish people in Hamden.

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At a recent Shabbat service, we had a couple visiting town stop in to visit us. They knew someone who was a member, but had no other affiliation or information about the Temple. And, although some spiritual reason brought them to Shabbat services, they did not appear to be particularly “religious.” After services were over, I invited them to join us for Kiddush and they grabbed some stuffed shells (they were excellent!) and sat down and mingled with the crowd.

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A few weeks back, a classmate of my fourth grade son lost his mother after a 6-year battle with breast cancer.  Ever since they met and became friends in first grade, he knew that his friend’s mother was dying, but after 4 years of watching her lead an apparently normal life as an apparently regular mom, there was no reality to the concept of her dying.  Then one day he received a phone call from his classmate saying that his mother died.

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